Christmas Day

Okay don't get me wrong, I love the build up to Christmas. The cold air and excitement for snow (though that was a let down this year) and shopping for loved one's Christmas presents. But as all the anticipation builds up, it just makes the actual day more of a let down. Maybe it's because I'm getting too old to spend all day with my family and no one to really talk to, and I'm too young to have a place of my own to host my own Christmas. Today I've ended up laid on my bed practically passed out because of one glass of red wine (never drinking that again!). These feelings just make me all the more determined to have a Christmas with my friends when I'm older. To have drinks and laughs by the fire and open stupid piss-taking presents we've bought for each other. Don't think that I don't love my family, because I do a lot, its just I've never been a family oriented person and I just feel suffocated sometimes. Though with all of these feelings, I'm not worried. I know I have many Christmas days ahead of me and I will make them the best I can.