Warning, the following post contains the words 'fuck' and 'shit'

I thought I'd write a post just about random shit. Because lately all I do is talk about something in particular and don't really rant as much, which is what I love to do the most.
Okay so I can start by mentioning the complete state I was in last night. So it all began when I started the day being a lovely generous citizen by donating blood. Then after that I drunk my own weight in Malibu. Yes that's right, I got completely wasted. To be fair I was being smart, I had a pint of blood removed from my body! So I thought I'd replace it with a pint of Malibu.
I took a trip over to my buddy Zae's house and we got completely shit wrecked. At one point I actually crawled to get to the toilet but ended up on my back... on the floor...still in the same room.
I'm pretty sure at one point I tried to eat my own jacket... I think...oh wait yes I did because a picture of me doing so, has just appeared on Facebook. Good old Za'e ;)
I don't know what it is about Malibu, maybe because it's a Caribbean rum drink, but when I got home, I sat in the living room, in front of my mum and step-dad and just fucking ranted on like a retarded bear, blabbing random shit in a Jamaican accent. Seriously, I couldn't stop speaking in that accent, I was GONE.
So I had to drag myself upstairs and lie down so I could sober up and eventually take a shower. I aint taking a shower drunk because knowing me I would slip the fuck over and die.